So sometimes I get these really INCREDIBLE dreams that are super realistic, action packed, give me crazy super powers/cool stuff and have these awesome storylines that seem to span over days within the same sleep session.

Occasionally…or, well, rather often actually, my alarm wakes me up right in the middle of it as it gets reeeaally exciting.

I am then faced with a horrifying pair of options:

  • Give up on watching the rest of the dream and wake up to get ready
  • force myself to not wake up properly as I turn off the alarm and continue to sleep, finishing the dream, but generally sleeping in for another hour and be late for uni.

The really bad part, is in my sleepy state in the midst of all the dream excitement and not wanting to wake up, I ALWAYS choose the second one.

I have missed a lot of busses because of dreams.

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manicbotanic:

The only factual error in Futurama is that Nixon is the president of the world. We all know that if there ever was a world government somehow, by some bizarre set of happenings, Kevin Rudd would be the president

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thedorito:

I’m laughing so hard the balloons in my friends house for her party set off the motion sensor alarm and the police showed up and searched the house but no one was there. we drew the dumbest faces on the balloons just imagine walking into a house thinking there’s a robber and imagehello

…how did you laugh hard enough to make them do that? Did you wake them up or something? Were they trying to make you stop?

Did they think setting off the alarm would be sobering?

What if instead of school, there was just like, a whole bunch of gorillas in an arena, and instead of following arbitrary rules and marking, there was tag team battles where four people would have to go in and fight a gorilla, and the teams that didn’t get their arms torn off that round got to move on to the next grade.

What if instead of school, we just fought gorillas?

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Oh dear god it’s Gorge Takai reading star trek fanfiction

jaclcfrost:

the idea of getting flowers is so nice like. i would love flowers. i would love just a flower. you could give me just a fucking petal from a flower and i’d be happy damn

YES! BEHOLD THESE MIGHTY AND SHAMELESS PLANT GENITALS! FEEL THEIR SENSUAL TEXTURE! SMELL THEIR VULGAR PERFUUUME!

BATHE IN THE DEPRAVITY!!

OOOOOOOOOOHH MYYYY YESSSSSSSSS.

You know, I always had the habit of saying “you have to be up in the morning” when I meant “You have to be up early” just as a general thing.

But as my sleep patterns have moved deper and deeper into the evennings, I’ve been meaning it quite literally as “you have to be awake before mid day!!”

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kawaiiserket:

devotedcrow:

wow andrew hussie is really sexist

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i mean jesus

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look at how weak he makes the females

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how can anyone say he isnt sexist

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oh wow and how cowardly he makes them

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how

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frail

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and

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weak

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never have i seen anything more sexist

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how unacceptable

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he

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only

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ever

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objectifies

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them

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they arent strong

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they dont fight for themselves

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they rely on men for everything

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they never make sacrifices

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yes

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hussie is so sexist

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so

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very

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sexist

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like two of those people are drunken mothers too

but like…who actually says that though?

It’s almost a universal fact in homestuck that the girls are more badass than the guys?

I mean hell, LOOK AT THE ALPHA TROLL SESSION. SERIOUSLY. The girls in that are like “woah, pretty neat” the guys are all fucking TRAINWRECKS.

I mean, I’m not saying none of the guys are over the top badasses, heck, Dirk is pretty much a mary sue, but like…no one in their right mind is gunna say hussie makes weak female characters, no one says that. It just doesn’t happen.

If you found the last real life unicorn, and had the only chance anyone will ever have to eat it, would you?

I mean like, you could show people, but then everyone would see the unicorn, then it’s not special.

If you eat it though, if you eat the only remaining unicorn in the world: NO ONE ELSE WILL EVER BE ABLE TO DO IT AGAIN.

You will be the only person in history to eat a unicorn.

How many of you would be strong enough to pass up that oppotunity?

Not me, that’s for damn sure.

If I see that unicorn, I’m having goddamn unisteaks that day.

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